Negative vibe

Hello all. Well, what can I say? I'm not sure how to start this post off because all I'm going to do is moan my head off anyway. You don't have to read it, but it's my blog, so there!!

I was "stewarding" at the show today, and each time I do it I come home feeling negative and down. There just doesn't seem to be a very positive vibe this time, or maybe it's just me? I can't decide.

Why it could be me: I seem to need a lot of reassurance about my work, and I'm just not getting it. I "only" sold two sets of coasters on the preview evening, and nothing since. Still, I keep trying to remind myself that someone liked my Jane Austen theme enough to buy the coasters, and that maybe they just couldn't afford a larger piece. No-one has left a comment in my comments book this time though, which mean as much to me as sales.

Why it's probably the vibe from the show: I don't even know where to start with this one! I really hate snobbery and partiality. On the preview evening I was talking to a member of the FPAA when someone else butted in to introduce a posh looking lady who was obviously very "important", and suddenly I wasn't in the conversation anymore, and I was left standing there looking at someones back. I was too tired to care at the time, but with other events this week it's really starting to niggle me.

You may recall that in the summer when Stella (a fabulous artist and a really lovely lady) won both "Best Ceramic" and "Runner up", Scott was outraged. It really didn't bother me at all, but Scott was convinced that it was all fixed. But this time round it is starting to bother me, but not because I haven't won anything, but because I just hate hate hate the favouritism thing. Once again Stella has won the "Best Sculpture" (and rightly so), but maybe others had mentioned that she shouldn't win both 1st and runner up because this time there isn't a runner up!

I started looking around at the other pieces that had won prizes, because I noticed that some fabulous paintings had been completely overlooked, and some of the winners weren't actually as good. What I noticed is that a high percentage of those who had won were committee members of the FPAA (and two of them were there while the judging was taking place). I don't know why this depresses me, but it really does. Other people have noticed it as well, including the actual owner of the Museum, who made a complaint to the Chair Person of the FPAA. She was very honest (despite being a winner herself) and agreed that the person who judges needs to be someone from another town who doesn't know any of the members. But sadly, some other committee members (who have won three years in a row) feel very strongly that the judge stay the same... it just disgusts me, and I don't particularly want to be associated with an organisation like that.

So I'm wondering if all of this is affecting the "vibe" at the show. It just doesn't feel the same as it did a couple of years ago before I was a member. I remember going to the preview evening with Anita and the room was just buzzing. I've never seen it as busy as it was that night and the vibe has never felt the same. This one feels worse though.

All of that being said, I have to say that it is a beautiful exhibition with lots of different styles and media.

Rant over. I'm just not sure about renewing my membership at the end of the year.